December 31, 2004

At Year's End

It would appear that I am running out of year with which to blog. That would also mean that we are nearing our 1-year anniversary at and that it is about time for me to post my year in review.

But as I work to do all of this compiling and whatnot, I would like to wish everyone a happy New Year and note that while the Asia quake-related death tolls are topping 120,000 there appear to be minimal to nonexistant animal fatalities. How bizarre...

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December 29, 2004

Blown Back In

So after my brief stay in the windy city, I am back with Anna. I guess it's now time for us to get quasi-serious about wedding planning after almost 2 weeks of slacking bliss.

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December 27, 2004

322 Miles to Chicago

Elwood: "It's 106 miles to Chicago, we've got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark and we're wearing sunglasses."
Jake: "Hit it."

(name that movie)

Gone to fetch the wench... back Wednesday.

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December 26, 2004

Fruits For Jesus

I'm going to hunt down the sermon mp3 from today and bring a copy back with me. My youth pastor gave the sermon today and at the very end, he was trying to make a point about love and the church body as a whole. When he prefaced his illustration with, "I told my wife this morning that I was going to do this, and she laughed at me," I knew we were in trouble.

He started out well by pulling out a bowl and saying that without an emphasis on loving one another, the church is a lot like the empty bowl... a nice bowl, but very empty and not doing anyone a lot of good. Then he paused, and pulled out a pair of apples, and likened some members to apples where it doesn't take long to get through their thin protective layer and get to know the "sweet part." So we're still good. And then he pulls out a pear, noting the slightly thicker skin and the different nature from the apple. And then a grapefruit, noting the really thick skin and the fundamentally different contents. We're starting to lose him there, but then things get really interesting. Bill pulled out two oranges, looked from one to the other almost stunned, and kind of blurted out, "and some of us are just happy, shiny people." Still kind of dazed, he tossed the oranges in the bowl with the other fruit, pulling out a banana. Staring at it, he mumbled somethign about rotting bananas and having to cut them up and stuff. Without much further production, he started referring to us collectively as the "fruits of the Church." And then, to finish off his abortive efforts, Bill noted the sniggering occurring in the youth section, realized what he'd said, and proudly announced:

"Hey, it's ok to be a fruit as long as you're being a fruit for Jesus!"

Thanks Bill.

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December 25, 2004

Merry Christmas

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Christmas Shenanigans

For those of you who are tired of bumming with family and/or people who annoy you to death (the two groups tend not to be mutually exclusive):

Go download Jardinains! It's like Breakout... only with gnomes to pick on. What's not to love?

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December 24, 2004


In light of the wonderful roads and snow emergency, I decided to defy the odds and the authorities and drove down to Tim's house. I arrived about half way through It's a Wonderful Life, so we finished watching that, played some cards and were generally bums until about 3 am. At this point, it was decided that we should make a Perkins run.
After digging out the end of Tim's driveway to the point that I could get the van out, Tim, his sister Christy, Danny G and I drove off into the snowy night. The roads were crappy and largely unplowed as we drove through the sleet towards Perkins. We drove by Dunkin Donuts and Christy whined loudly about our choice of Perkins over her beloved Dunkin Donuts. Driving on, we arrived at Perkins only to note that the 24-hour establishment had closed. Christy gleefully announced that we were going to Dunkin Donuts, and the rest of us lacked counterarguments in that we lacked alternatives... so I turned around and we went to Dunkin Donuts.

Here is where I made the mistake. The doughnuts were fresh, as they were being placed on the trays as we arrived. I, however, didn't see fit just to order a doughnut... so I ordered a bacon and egg croissandwich. I really should have suspected something was up when the sandwich was rubbery as if it had been microwaved, but I was hungry and I ate it without much thought. And that was that until 10 pm at Tim's house, when I awoke to an angry stomach. It wanted to get rid of the badness, and it wasn't taking no for an answer.

So there was puking badness followed by a feeling of much relief. Sadly, this resulted in a mess. The mess was cleaned and I took a shower and went home. Unfortunately, the driveway at home was covered in snow and the subdivision was in a bad way. So I parked the van in the road and climbed up the driveway to help clean the driveway of snow. It was shortly after this that I noted a fundemental truth of food poisoning: it leaves you weak. I was barely able to shovel at a rate of 1/4 that of my little brother. So after about 10 minutes of my abortive efforts, my mom came out and sent me inside. It was around this point that I realized I was feeling much sicker. So I got some pajamas on and crashed on the couch, where I remained for about 6 hours after ingesting a peptobismol. For dinner I had a piece of toast and a glass of coke, following which I went to bed.

Anna called around 7:00, and I got sick again between when she called to tell me her brother's cell number and when I called her back. That said, it was nice to hear from her... and very encouraging to know that there was someone out there who had a better day than I did.

After talking to her, I went back to bed and slept fitfully and deliriously until about 12:30. My fever-addled dreams had something to do with a cathedral or something... I don't recall except that the whole thing made very little sense even in my fitful state and I was happy to awaken at 12:30, at least until I noted that I had a terrible migraine. Hobbling upstairs, I was happy to note that Jonny was still up, and he graciously went and got some Excedrin for me. So now I'm without a headache and about to go back to bed. NO MORE POISON!!!

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December 22, 2004

Snowed In

Mmm... I love snow. That said, I hate it when there's so much on the ground that you can't get anywhere. It's so beautiful... and such a pain in the butt.

The difference between the Midwest and the Northeast is that in the Northeast (and just about anywhere else that averages over 40 inches of snow in a winter) it is known that if you plow the snow when it starts and keep plowing, the roads will stay clear. In Cincinnati, nobody has that one figured out. So when there were 4 inches of snow on the road, someone realized, "Crap! Cars are getting stuck! Quick, get plowing!"

But by then, it was too late. And so the area is in a snow emergency and I don't think that we're supposed to go out in the snow unless we have a very good reason to be out on the roads. Not that I will allow such nonsense to stop me... but life could prove interesting between now and Christmas. Stupid government plow monkeys...

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December 20, 2004

Bunch of Saps

Well, I would like to thank the bunch of saps whom I call my friends for responding so kindly to my post regarding engagement. I will try to keep you all posted as things roll along... but right now I'm mostly just settling in for a nice, restful Christmas.

Oh yeah, and unlike some others whom I know, I get to experience the joy that is a bustling Christmas, and I love it.

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December 19, 2004

"It's About Time"

So I was faced with a conundrum... do I let her go home and hold on to this thing for a week and a half, having already asked for permission, or do I ask her the question and give her the ring.

Now, obviously the ring wasn't doing me a whole lot of good in my pocket. In fact, its large angular box was causing discomfort on a purely physical level, not to mention mental and emotional anguish that the unasked question was wreaking. Had I talked to her about marriage before? Yes. Was it almost certain that she would say yes? Oh, yeah. Would she kill me if I didn't get around to asking soon? You'd better believe it. Was I still nervous about asking her? Quite.

That said, I had even gotten the really hard part out of the way the night before when I called her father to get permission. I mangled the hell out of asking him, and really illustrated my ability to turn even the simplest of sentences into a convolusion on par with the Gordian Knot. But Anna's father was benevolent and saw it in his heart to ease my worries and give me permission to ask Anna.

So with permission to ask out of the way, here I was with this ring and this question and the awkward problem to solve. Oh yeah, and I was sitting in an airport, looking at the reality of being about 3 hours from letting her go for a week and a half... and I didn't want to do that.

I was out of cards, folks, so I improvised. It was sadly unromantic, and I regret not being able to do better with the time I was given, but I wasn't given much. So I asked her if she wanted her gift now or later. She said now, and thus she was offered the gift. She accepted and said "yes" to the question that came to her with the opening of the gift, and has thusly set my mind at ease... to at least this stage of things.

And so, we await May 8... the day of a celebration to which all of our friends are invited and which, hopefully, will be more romantic and less necessarily practical.

More details coming... stay posted. And in the meanwhile, see what my fiancιe* says about the matter.

*Note the gender-correct spelling, Wilson.

December 17, 2004

Once Again At Home

So here I am, back at home in Cincinnati. I'm alive, well and all in one piece. More news coming, pending sleep and thought.

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Finals Observed

I'm posting odd things I see during finals week here:

12/14/2004 1:04 AM - Gallagher practices singing along with Catholic Hymns (specifically, "Bring Flowers of the Rarest")
12/14/2004 1:09 AM - Wilson prances through the Ice Cave flapping his hands like wings and saying "I'm Jet Li! I'm Jet Li!"

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December 15, 2004


Finals week is upon my brain...




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December 14, 2004

Cultural Christianity

Dunny found this excellent rant on Cultural Christianity. You should check it out.

Posted by Vengeful Cynic at 10:26 PM | TrackBack


To the outside world:

Yes, I'm alive in here. Not particularly thriving at the moment, but I am working myself to a near-fatal state in order to pass my classes this semester.

To those in here with me:

I'm in apartment 12A, MSC1 or the computer labs. I would love it if you came to give me a hand: either in the form of fellowship or maybe C++ programming.... I'll take either or.

On a slightly sarcastic note: *

It's finals time, and that means it's time for me to drink myself into a gutter. Come one, come all to the Wednesday night binge-fest. That will be the Cynic, laying in the gutter in a slushy pool of half-frozen cheap beer, vomit and indiscernable fluid. You should join me in the gutter... I'm buying.

*I have gone to the trouble of dropping in the specific note about SARCASM because I know LU Admin probably reads this blog and you never can tell if they can take a joke. Also, some of you don't know me too well and might actually suspect that I would do something like this. I assure you, I have no intention of ever finding myself in the state enumerated above.

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December 09, 2004

Finals Schedule

7:30 – 9:30 a.m.
9:45 – 11:45 a.m.
9:45 – 11:45 a.m.
12:45 – 2:45 p.m.
9:45 – 11:45 a.m.

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December 08, 2004

Craving the Warpedness

A Desperate Guatemalan in Search of "Real Ultimate Power"

So apparently my roommate was astonished that the warped link I had shared with him wasn't yet posted. As he put it, "WHY isn't it on your blog? I need it!"

Another addict joins my happy distribution chain.

So without further ado, I bring you Real Ultimate Power - the bound and printed edition. Ninjas, on paper, flipping out and killing things. Go Robert Hamburger!

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December 07, 2004

Magical Trevor

Thank Scott for this family-friendly (even for small children) link to Magical Trevor.

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December 06, 2004


Thank Melby for this:

(note: all of my answers apply to people at school or with affiliation with the SC)

You've Known the longest: Ardith (she and I met at Heritage Weekend, sitting in Shreveport airport)
You've known the shortest: Fleetman
You love the most: God (Anna is the human I love the most)
The one thats most special: duh
You can tell anything to: Ice Cavers and Anna
Lives farthest away: Ma Hoyt
Lives closest: Ice Cavers, duh
Weirdest: Dr. Solganick
Funniest: Murray
Most Shy: toss-up: Ardith and Bryan
Quietest: Bryan
Smartest: clearly Murray
Coolest: the ever-popular Ardith
Biggest Flirt: Rachel
Sweetest: BAH!!
Cutiest: Ma Hoyt
Tallest: Bryan
Shortest: duh! (Melby is runner-up) (note that Murray is taller than Melby and Ardith)
Most outgoing: Moore
Most hyper: Rachel
Most friendly: Sharpton
Most caring: Anna (Paige wants to be caring)
Most annoying: *pleads the 5th*
Most irritating: Me
Most TRULY unique: Uncle Doug (and Murray, of course)
Most kissable: ;-)
Most confusing: Sharon (slow down, Sharon)
Most confused: Rachel
Most adorable: Ardith (in a dress)
Most crazy: Caleb Mayes
Always there for you: the Ice Cave
Always makes you laugh: FREUD!!
Always has something clever to say: The Punny Man (Martinez)
Always makes you really think: The Denizens of the Fuzzy Studies Offices
Always brightens your day: Female with Food (Anna and Paige)
Most likely to be on tv? Scott
Most likely to end up flipping burgers: Wheeler and Barbour
The ones you would like to see in person: Ma Hoyt
The one who's never been single: Paige
The one who's always single: Uncle Doug
First to get married: *coughs nervously*
The one you'd be dating if it wasn't for the boyfriend/girlfriend
(do I look that stupid to you?)
The player: Sharptiano
The heartbreaker: Murray (all the girls want to jump his bones, but none of them can)

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December 03, 2004

License for Evil

I would like to thank Ma Hoyt for sending me a birthday card with a license to cause trouble... specifically to "Do Evil." I think everyone around here would like to join me in thanking her for such a gracious push in the right direction. I feel truly inspired to go wreak havoc.

Posted by Vengeful Cynic at 04:45 PM | TrackBack

December 01, 2004

unHappy Birthday...

I just want to thank everyone for the birthday cards and whatnot that I've received. Right now I'm a bit too busy to do much other than work. It's not that my friends haven't come together and been with me on an enjoyable day, but rather that I'm far too busy to really get much enjoyment between all of the work that's coming due.

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