December 13, 2005

Coke News

It would appear that nobody can get enough coke. First off, it appears that Coca-cola has gone and done something intriguing... albeit disgusting: Coke Blak = Coke + Coffee. Sounds nasty to me... but maybe it will be the new stay awake drink of choice.

In other coke news, apparently some people can't even go to work without hitting their coke. Not that I could really blame a sustitute teacher for needing to get high to deal with students... but at the same time, I also can't blame the school district for calling the cops and getting him arrested for getting high while at school... teaching no less. The best part of this to me is that the substitute originally claimed that he was just grinding up his cold pills and snorting them because he couldn't find any water. Pssst... dude, first off, nobody but a druggie even considers grinding up cold pills and snorting them, and second off, the whole line about no water kinda falls flat in a school with all of the freaking water fountains.

And finally, some people want coke so bad, they're willing to hire hit men to get it. The problem arises when said people are so lackluster in their intelligence that they manage to hire an undercover cop as a hit man... to steal what turns out to be a giant block... of CHEESE. Some people are so stupid that they get no coke.

Posted by Vengeful Cynic at December 13, 2005 08:20 AM | TrackBack