April 22, 2004

Have a Miserable Earth Day

I used to be ambivalent about Earth Day. I just can't say that I cared much one way or another... mostly due to the fact that while I respect the Earth and don't want it to become a rotted-out apple core upon which we live, I am a fairly firm believer in the ability of natural processes to rebound from just about anything mankind can do. That said, until the advent of a series of liberals and obnoxious Science teachers, I was just of the opinion that Earth Day was an occasion for variety in the announcements over the PA in school.

...And then I ran afoul of some morons who believed that the Earth was a purpose and an end in and unto itself. "Save the earth! Blow up buildings and save the earth! Sacrifice yourself to stop deforestation!" These were the cries of the idiots who felt the paramount cause was that of conservation. Humanity was inferior for its inability to live within their paradigm of naturalism. And then I decided that I would deal with the problem of Mother Earth at some later date... and spite these morons while I still could.

Thus, I pronounce it a Miserable Earth Day. It is today that I litter, light fire to things, and destroy the habitats of Eco-terrorists and rabid animals alike!

Posted by Vengeful Cynic at April 22, 2004 05:38 PM | TrackBack