December 10, 2004

The Trans-Siberian Trek

It wasn't nearly as cold as I expected. And I didn't see any Russian peasants. But then, what did I expect? After all it's not like I was in Siberia this evening. In fact, I wasn't anywhere near it. I was in Dallas, enjoying the Trans-Siberian Orchestra holiday concert.

A brief run-down of the pertinent events: We drove to Dallas in a three-car caravan directly after my last class of the semester had adjourned. I was in Anna's car with Scholl and Rachel. We stopped at Taco Bell for supper about 35 miles from Dallas. All three cars got separated in Dallas and missed the correct exit.

Gallagher got back on track with sickening ease. Barbour eventually trailed in with plenty of time to spare. Our car wandered the labyrinthine streets of downtown Dallas for nearly an hour, just so we could make a dramatic entrance and collapse into our seats as the lights blazed forth onstage, beginning the concert. It was exciting, therefore we win.

Further excitement ensued (enough to go around) when the concert was interrupted about 20 minutes in by what turned out to be a false alarm. As we later heard, someone had been smoking in the bathroom and it had set off the fire alarm. It was kinda funny . . . it took nearly a full minute for everyone (including the orchestra, apparently) to figure out that the alarm wasn't part of the show.

And now, without further ado, my review of the proceedings, also in brief:

First Half
Music- A+
Special Effects- A+
Vocals- B
Lyrics- D
Poetry- F
Plot- F

Second Half
A++!!!

The first half contained songs and instrumental interludes strung together by a really bad poem that told an extremely sappy, hollow Christmas-ish story. Anytime there was anyone playing an instrument, I was enjoying myself, but as soon as they started talking . . . gevalt! I remember one verse of the poem verbatim . . . you can extrapolate the basics of the rest for yourself.

Then the angel took
The song in his hand.
And he did this because,
You see, angels can.

Ugh. The plot of the poem wasn't difficult to discern, however most of it consisted of nonsensical phrases like the one above which were seemingly thrown in just so they could have it rhyme. I don't really feel like giving the story too much attention.

It was about an angel wandering around on Christmas Eve feeling saddened by the horror he saw on earth before making everything better by helping a little girl get home (somehow she was apparently hundreds of miles away from her house, but this wasn't explained). This was accomplished by talking the nearest bartender into giving her all the cash in his register.

The catalyst for this Christmas miracle was a wish that the girl made on a star. Only it wasn't a star because stars were in short supply, so she wished on the neon sign that announced the presence of the bar. The poem asserted that anything can be a star if you just wish hard enough. Gag.

Once that nonsense was finally over, they got down to business. We heard some awesome stuff, from "The Carol of the Bells" (everyone's favorite), to "O Fortuna" and "Requiem." The pyrotechnics were amazing . . . explosions, flares, jets of sparks, lasers, strobes, crazy color combinations, smoke and fog . . . Fantastic stuff. It was a brilliant combination of Classical genius with Christmas warmth, talented musicians, and rock concert spectacle.

I approve.

Posted by Jared at December 10, 2004 11:59 PM | TrackBack