March 03, 2005

The "Proper Behavior" for a Gentleman

It seems like it has been quite some time since something said in chapel has inspired me to publish a rant. I did not realize that until I started writing this. How strange. Anyway, on to the point. . .

I have generally enjoyed the series of chapels from the counselor lady. This may be because I generally enjoy psycho-babble type stuff, but I think that would be an entirely different topic. While she really hasn't introduced anything groundbreaking to the student body, she has reinforced a number of ideas that I believe are important for most people to understand.

Then, she had to ruin it with her opinion of the "proper gentleman."

A "proper gentleman," as far as I can tell, is willing to sacrifice anything and everything at the drop of a hat in order to make a "lady" comfortable and/or at ease. I have no problem with those who voluntarily do everything they can to ensure a woman never has to lift a finger in the presence of a man. However, a problem arises when people begin constantly expecting that behavior from me.

I will gladly help a woman carry things, open a door for a woman, or "defend" a woman's honor. I don't see assisting a woman as acting as a "gentleman." I see it as being courteous. Therefore, in my mind, the system works both ways. If a woman says she does not need help with something, I will not offer help with it again. If a woman asks if she can help me, I am going to let her help.

I expect people to treat me in the same manner, and I do mean people of both sexes. If I offer to help, either let me help or tell me that my help is not required. If I say I do not want help, do not continually ask if I need it.

Apparently, this means I am not a "gentleman." Thankfully, I do not really care.

Posted by Randy at March 3, 2005 08:33 PM | TrackBack