Why can't I accept a sincere compliment gracefully? Why do I always feel the need to utter some self-deprecating nonsense whenever someone gives me genuine praise? Why do I always feel uncomfortable right after I am given a compliment?
I have a theory. I've been told what's wrong with me quite often in my life. My family (God bless 'em) sometimes focuses on what is wrong with people instead of what is good about them. I was the "smart kid" throughout school. This brought about hideous amounts of ridicule, teasing, etc., from even my friends at school. My friends and I were brutal with each other to the point that some people thought we hated each other. This causes me to subconsiously feel that something harsh is coming after any real compliment. I begin to feel uncomfortable when it doesn't, and I tear myself down in order to make myself feel better. Instead of saying "Thank you," I say "Thank you, but..."
That isn't right. When I'm given a compliment, I should be able to accept it without feeling guilty, uncomfortable, or simply wrong.
I've known this for some time now. So, if I know what's wrong, why can't I fix it?
Posted by Randy at April 29, 2004 12:55 PM | TrackBackRandy,
You were a great roomate, even though i was not.
Yeah, I do the same thing to myself. The only reason that I can figure is that somewhere along the line, I got it in my head that degradeing myself would get me attention from others, even if it was at the expense of my self-worth.
Posted by: Amare Hubris at April 30, 2004 12:33 PM