March 15, 2004

Spiritual Ramblings

Today was rather interesting. I had to go back to Longview twice.

The first time was around 9:00 in the morning. My mother had to go and see an accountant. Why we use an accountant in Longview I will never know. Apparently, he was finished with all of the taxes that my family had to file. Unfortunately, his superiors were not finished looking over them or something. He couldn't give them to us just yet. After that disappointing news we headed to LU so that I could get a couple of things I forgot. I spent ten freakin' minutes looking around the room to make sure I didn't forget anything. Naturally, I forgot several things. Anyway, I had forgotten my keys, but fortunately for me I was able to get in another way. After that we went and practically forced one of the financial aid people to fill out a FAFSA for us.

On the trip home, my mother and I got on the topic of Anne Rice. Now, I have always felt blessed with my mother. She didn't freak out when I played Magic: The Gathering, she has always been a fan of horror movies, and she, generally, shares my reading tastes. Therefore, I feel perfectly comfortable discussing and debating literature with her.

I started with how I thought Anne Rice was a good writer. She explained how one of her co-workers has read everything written by Rice. I explained that I could see why some people (read: Christians) have problems with her and how I thought she had anti-religious rhetoric in her novels. She countered by saying she understood why Christians were upset with her writings. I replied with my beliefs that Christians should read these "controversial" things because many non-believers read them and that these novels can help a Christian find new angles to explain things to non-believers.

At this point, my mother threw out a statement which dazed me for a moment. This dazed me not because of the idea in the statement but because I had believed the very same thing not too long ago.

"I don't believe that Christians need to argue and explain our position. I think that every religion is worshipping the same God, just in different ways."

I told her that I had once believed that, too, but I do not anymore. I then explained why I knew that was not the case. That thought, however, caused my mind to wander back to when I first believed in it. I remember I was around ten or twelve and I was listening to my parents and a couple of their friends discussing religion. At one point, I piped in with that idea and it didn't leave my head until I had become a semi-atheist.

Ever since my sister's death I have seen God working in my mother's life. She has read a great number of books about God and grief. She is listening to Christian music. She is willing to have theological discussions. She isn't finished working her way towards God, though. She still has a ways to go. Looking at that makes me realize how far I still need to go and how spiritually lazy I have been around my home.

Was my naive comment seven or so years ago what put that thought into my mother's head? How many of my actions have caused Christians to stumble in their walks? How many of those Christians have caused others to stumble? These are all some very frightening thoughts to me.

Posted by Randy at March 15, 2004 08:33 PM | TrackBack