October 07, 2008

Family Rules

My lovely wife and I decided to come up with some household rules, to aid in the governance of our eventual progeny.

1. Mom and Dad are always right.
2. Mom is righter then Dad.*
3. If Mom or Dad are proved wrong, refer to rule #1.
4. All rules must be memorized.
5. Rules instantiated post-event are still applicable to that event.
6. The rules are fair.
7. The rules are not fair.
8. The rules do not apply to Mom and Dad.
9. All the rules do not necessarily have to be divulged.
11. If the door to your parent's room is closed, stay away as you value your mortal soul (and mental health).
12. A clean room is next to godliness. In fact, it is godly in and of itself. (refer to rule #8).
13. Argument and debate over the rules is encouraged. It is also never successful.
15. Residents of age greater then 10 must pay for housing and food expenses.
16. No reading modern fiction without reading everything written before it.
17. The censor must approve of all printed materials brought on the premises.
18. Thou shalt fix my internets.
19. Fights and arguments amongst progeny are permissible insomuch as they do not disturb our royal slumber.
20. The rules are sekrit. Tell NO ONE.

* Certain articles are under debate between the parental figures. No, you don't get out of them.

Are we missing anything key to a happy and well-rounded child-rearing career?
Also, those who have had or are planning to have children shortly are encouraged to use this resource, albeit with credit (and royalties).

Posted by Moore at October 7, 2008 08:26 PM